Hilary Duff’s new video, featuring samples from “Personal Jesus”

The bastardization of all that’s sacred is complete. Hilary Duff’s latest single is a blatant rip-off of one Depeche Mode’s biggest songs, Personal Jesus, except she changes the loner-and-loser lyrics to bubble-gum sexual innuendo-lite and steals Britney Spears’ vocal machine.

For all you youngsters out there, Depeche Mode was the emo of the 80s. I’m obviously showing my age, but People are People instantly transports me back to junior high school dance parties.

Personal Jesus was released in 1989. It was actually inspired by Elvis Presley, according to band member Martin Gore.

It’s a song about being a Jesus for somebody else, someone to give you hope and care. It’s about how Elvis was her man and her mentor and how often that happens in love relationships; how everybody’s heart is like a god in some way, and that’s not a very balanced view of someone, is it?

[From Wikepedia]

It’s also about being alone and having someone just as lonely to comfort you in your solitude. When you’re 18 and about to move 1000 miles away for college where you have no friends, it’s bloody brilliant.

Here are some of the lyrics:

Your own Personal Jesus
Someone to hear your prayers
Someone who cares
Your own Personal Jesus
Someone to hear your prayers
Someone who’s there

Feeling unknown
And you’re all alone
Flesh and bone
By the telephone
Lift up the receiver
I’ll make you a believer

Take second best
Put me to the test
Things on your chest
You need to confess
I will deliver
You know I’m a forgiver

Reach out and touch faith

Here are the lyrics to the Hilary Duff version, called Reach Out:

Tunnel vision had him locked on in my sight
On a mission, for position by the end of the night
It’s like a prayer, playin’ games with the hunter
You better run boy, time to surrender

And all I need is to feel you
All I want is to feel you

Reach out and touch me
Before I go insane
Reach out and touch me
Boy don’t you make me wait
I’m a diamond and you’re so on the money
Reach out and touch me
And all I need is to feel you
Reach out and touch me

Like a prayer, your touch can take me there
Ain’t no mind, you and me in a secret affair
Oh boy you’re killing me and you don’t even know it
Try to hold back but I can’t control it

There’s even a rip-off of (or possibly an homage to) Madonna’s Like a Prayer.

This makes me sad in so many ways. I’m sure Depeche Mode will make a ton of money from it, but music today is so vapid that even Depeche Mode are only in it for the money. Hilary Duff has turned into a poor man’s Britney Spears clone. And I feel old ranting against kids these days and their music.

I think I’ll go put on The Smiths. That’s sure to cheer me up, at least until Miley Cyrus covers Girlfriend in a Coma.

For any of you whippersnappers who like the Hilary Duff song, her album Best of Hilary Duff will be released November 11.

Here’s the original version of Depeche Mode’s “Personal Jesus,” which is much much better.