We know now that the reason Leah Remini skipped out on good friend Jennifer Lopez’s August Sauna Ceremony was because Leah was soaking up the last few precious moments with her daughter before she went to college. Sofia Pagan is Leah and husband Anthony Pagan’s only child. The family has not made what school she is attending public, but she’s going out of state for school and Leah had to say goodbye last weekend. She posted the throwback photo above with the caption below. In it, Leah said she’d never cried so much than bringing Sofia to college. I warn you, there is a chance you’ll end up in tears before you’re done reading Leah’s caption.

Bringing our only child to college for the first time has been the most excruciatingly painful and proudest moment of my life. I have never cried so much in my life. I am only comforted by meeting other parents at Target who bonded with me over our mutual pain and pride.

It is the hardest thing I have ever done, and I’m still torturing myself with the idea that I might have pushed my daughter on the college track because I never got to go when I was her age. I am entering my second year at NYU, so now we’re both college students! I know many of you are going through this, not just sending your kids to college for the first time, but many of my friends are sending their children to kindergarten for the first time, and I remember that day like it was yesterday.

Angelo and I sat in the parking lot of our daughter’s school, crying like babies, and discussed pulling her out and homeschooling her. It is not easy to let go; change is so hard. It feels so unbelievably wrong to get on a plane without my daughter and leave her to be an adult when she is still just our baby in my and her dad’s eyes. I don’t look forward to going home where my daughter’s room will be empty without her until she comes home for Thanksgiving.

My heart goes out to all the parents and caretakers who might be going through this bittersweet journey.

The good news is, Thanksgiving is in 83 days…

[From Instagram via People]

I hope Leah flew First Class so she could cry in comfort and privacy. It’s such a relatable post. I have to believe it hits differently for those with only children, too. You go from parent to empty nester overnight. Parents with more than one kid spread it out over years. I laughed at Leah reflecting on pulling Sofia out and homeschooling her in Kindergarten. Like, “it’s been an hour, I can’t handle this! Get her out of there.” I kind of remember my mom and other parents sharing those bonding looks when she dropped me off at uni. I was her last to leave, though. My father couldn’t come with us, he couldn’t bear to think of me moving out. He’s still trying to negotiate a time share agreement with my husband.

The part that spoke to me the most was when Leah said, “I’m still torturing myself with the idea that I might have pushed my daughter on the college track because I never got to go when I was her age.” I imposed so many educational standards on my kids, it did some damage. So I backed off and they’ve really found their footing in school. They’ve chosen very different college paths than I’d intended for them, but they’re happy, which is better. I’m glad that Leah is able to let Sofia go so far away, given how attached she is to her. Some parents would try to keep their kids closer to home and Sofia had options closer to home. It’ll probably be important for both of them to make that break and keep that distance so Sofia can fully immerse herself but I’m sure it’s hard for Leah.

Leah had a follow up post in which she thanked all the people who helped her move Sofia in, like her sister. Sofia’s best friend was there too. And Leah’s mom had her favorite meal waiting for her when she got home. Aw. Leah needs to call Heidi Klum so they can commiserate together.