Pretty Little Liars star, Troian Bellisario, welcomed a baby girl about 10 months ago. We don’t know her name yet and Troian and husband, Patrick J Adams, haven’t posted her face on social media, but Troian did open up about one aspect of their lives that maybe isn’t her favorite: breastfeeding. In honor of World Breastfeeding Week (which ended yesterday), Troian posted the above pics to her Instagram and wrote the following caption:

#worldbreastfeedingweek I would never have thought something so simple would be so complicated. My milk came in immediately (so lucky!) my daughter has always eaten well (little bit of reflux but all good) and breastfeeding her was never painful or frustrating (SO RARE) but the mastitis🥴, waking up in the middle of the night to pump😴, pulling off on the freeway to pump, or hiding in dark corners of houses while pumping or else I can’t sleep it’s SO PAINFUL🥵 (I’ve included the most glamorous I’ve ever looked while feeling like an effing cow) having to be conscious of everything I put or do not put in my body (it’s been almost two years if you count pregnancy) and that means alcohol, medication, even melatonin! I can’t even join in all of this cool CBD stuff that’s happening.But… no matter how much I HATE pumping or how complicated MY relationship with food is, it has been a joy, an honor and a no brainer to feed my daughter this way. 🙌🏽 My body has made it easy for us and i have loved every moment i get to spend this kind of time with her. Not every mother gets that. I don’t know if I will have it for much longer, but I will always take care of her and do what is best for us. (Once again f*ck pumping. Love you forever babay girl)

As is well known in these parts, I hated breastfeeding and couldn’t care less when a woman decides to stop. I know that’s probably not a very evolved comment, but I’ve never claimed to be very evolved. I was curious about Troian’s tone because it reads a little like “Breastfeeding sucks but I am so honored to be shackled to all its suckiness.” And again, that’s a fine opinion to hold, it was just such a big tonal shift from where I thought it was going. But then I remembered her hashtag about it being World Breastfeeding Week and the post makes sense. I think a lot of women have a very complicated relationship with breastfeeding. I wish I had found joy in it. There were many nights I was so overtired, I was grateful to whip out my boob instead of having to figure out how to make formula. But I do not miss a moment of it.

I know Troian mostly from her and her husband’s comments about weight, so it was her mention of her complicated relationship with food that really stuck out to me. I felt for her on this. I think this is yet another part of breastfeeding that should get discussed as well. I don’t have any insight to add, it’s just the first I’ve heard it brought up and something with which I struggled. I hope Troian finds her peace with breastfeeding and all the emotions it’s brought up in her.

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Photo credit: WENN Photos and Instagram